Randam Rants

I can't seem to get back into the swing of things at work! I have no idea what is wrong with me.. I just have no desire to be there or do anything. This in not good. Bad.Bad. Bad.
On non work relatedness.. HUMV got back in touch.. good talk! There is such a weird connection there...thinking it through I can't seem to put my finger on it. I don't know what to do about it - something or nothing...
I feel like I am still looking for the perfect life.. the perfect person... the something. What is that 'something'? Sometimes I feel like I forget that I control me and I can do anything 'I' want to.. weird? I know! I feel like I should be checking with someone... or making sure I am not hurting someone... I should just do what I want for me... but no idea why I can't. What stops me? and how do I get there?