Fall

I love fall. It always gives me a fresh perspective. Leaves falling, crisp morning dew - all signs that it is the time for renewal. Speaking of renewal, it makes me want to shed my old self and extra layers. Whether those layers are lbs, extra baggage or clutter. I love the opportunity that fall gives me to slow down and think about what I want to focus on for ME!
This time I have decided to work on losing a few lbs and get my shit together! Slowly... ever so slowly I am working on taking baby steps to watch what goes in my mouth; how many steps I take and how much extra paperwork or junk I can eliminate to feel better about me! Trust me - it is not an easy road, and I KNOW it will have lots and lots of potholes, but I am gonna focus and do my best to focus on me... for once!
I even have the GRAND plan to do more with less this holiday season - and really focus on the memories and season vs. feeling guilty over what I can or can not provide for my kids and others. Easier said here on my blog vs. doing, but I am sure gonna work hard at getting there!

Randam Rants

I can't seem to get back into the swing of things at work! I have no idea what is wrong with me.. I just have no desire to be there or do anything. This in not good. Bad.Bad. Bad.
On non work relatedness.. HUMV got back in touch.. good talk! There is such a weird connection there...thinking it through I can't seem to put my finger on it. I don't know what to do about it - something or nothing...
I feel like I am still looking for the perfect life.. the perfect person... the something. What is that 'something'? Sometimes I feel like I forget that I control me and I can do anything 'I' want to.. weird? I know! I feel like I should be checking with someone... or making sure I am not hurting someone... I should just do what I want for me... but no idea why I can't. What stops me? and how do I get there?

X Husbands and Mother's Day

Why is it that on the day that is supposed to be reserved for celebrating 'mothers' and all they do for us, our kids, our world and others my X has to be a total selfish jerk? Pretty typical and a true reminder of why we are no longer married.
I try my hardest to not show how his unkind remarks hurt me; and do my very best at not speaking unkind of him in front of the kids.. but DAMN! sometimes he can make it so difficult to not do so.

In my continued quest at enjoying my 3rd day of sabbatical - today was all and all fairly nice. My daily Starbucks run turned into two of my favorites and a Starbucks cinnamon roll for a treat! That personal trainer session on Tuesday will be wonderful for my over indulgences.

Dinner is calling! More to follow!

Saturday May 9, 2009

Does the weekend count as the beginning of a sabbatical from work? It doesn't feel like it should - still feels like a normal weekend and that I should be going back to work on Monday~
Walked 3 miles this am... hmm. this is starting to sound like Bridgette Jones. It's only 10pm and I am ready to crash; which the bullie already has! It's rough being cute.